Andy Carroll, Alexis Sanchez and Kaba Diawara are all among the worst signings of January. Andy Carroll, Alexis Sanchez and Kaba Diawara are all among the worst signings of January. January can bring great things, but it can also bring dross. Piano playing, pie scoffing, fake robbery, overrated scum… After looking at the biggest ever January signings from all Premier League clubs, we look at their worst…
Arsenal: Kaba Diawara Ole Gunnar Solskjaer may have seen Dennis Bergkamp’s penalty in the FA Cup semi-final when Arsenal’s Double became Manchester United’s Treble in 1999, but the sliding doors moment probably came later. In the last two games of the Premier League season, the sides have been separated by goal difference, both have tough games ahead of them. United were due to travel to Blackburn and host Tottenham, while Arsenal visited Leeds and faced Aston Villa at Highbury. Arsenal blinked first. Leeds beat them 1–0 24 hours before United’s 0–0 draw at Ewood Park, with Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink scoring the goal that clinched the title for United. But the game will always be remembered for the inexplicable waste of crossbar challenger Kaba Diawara, who was blocked about four times by the woodwork and Nigel Martyn in the space of 19 minutes. The striker joined in January for £2.5m and has been hailed by Arsene Wenger as the next Nicolas Anelka. Fifteen games, no goals and 123 days after moving to north London, he was loaned back to France and never played for the Gunners again. He was not the next Nicolas Anelka.
Aston Villa: Jean Makoun – He played in the Champions League. He is a good asset for the future,” said Gerard Houllier when he paid £6.2m for Lyon senior Jean Makoun in 2011. He was not a good asset for the future. A month later he was sent to Blackpool for DJ Campbell and things never improved as the Cameroonian made just eight league appearances for Villa before leaving on loan to Olympiakos and then Rennes on a permanent deal under the new Villa manager. Paul Lambert said he had no idea what he (Makouun) looked like. Even Philippe Coutinho made a bigger impression. And he was a Pole for Villa. Bournemouth: Lewis Grabban Eddie Howe reacts to his first January transfer window as a Premier League manager with Neil Custis’ unstoppable spat with Jim White. The fact that Josh King finished his first season as top scorer with seven goals suggests they needed a striker, but £18m for Juan Iturbe, Benik Afobe and Lewis Grabban is rarely the answer. Iturbe was loaned out and Afobe was vaguely impressed by Premier League maiden Championship Wolves. But the deal for Grabban was just weird. Bournemouth signed the striker for £300,000 in 2012, sold him for £3m in 2014 and then kept one goal in six Premier League games for Norwich before parting with £8m to bring him back. He scored one goal in 22 appearances for the Cherries before finally leaving in 2018.
Brentford: Neil Shipperley Long before the Premier League Bees signed Christian Eriksen, they raised buckets to finance the wages of veteran striker Shipperley. He turned up at Griffin Park looking like he had been in KFC buckets since signing for Sheffield. United was cancelled. In 11 League One games, Shipperley failed to find the back of the net before taking the cue and pulling away. Brighton: Jürgen Locadia Brighton broke their club transfer record in 2018 by signing the Dutchman from PSV for more than £14m after an excellent half-year in which he scored nine goals in 15 Eredivisie games. “He’s a strong, powerful and quick centre-forward with a real eye for goal and will add to our attacking options in the second half of the season,” said Chris Hughton, who must have been pretty pleased with himself when Locadia scored. his debut from the bench. It would be the first of three goals in 34 Premier League matches. He was loaned to FC Cincinnati with an option to buy – the MLS club decided not to – before Locadia was allowed to leave last winter for nothing. He scored two goals in 10 games for Bochum but was last seen at Cangzou Mighty Lions with Iranian side Persepolis.
Chelsea: Juan Cuadrado We are currently deciding on Mykhaylo Mudryk, and while Fernando Torres is another obvious answer, especially since his transfer fee was more than double that of Cuadrado, his impact was three or four times more remarkable than that of the Colombian. Torres can at least claim to have played a huge role in the club’s Champions League and Europa League triumphs; Cuadrado has started four Premier League games and scored once for the title since his arrival in January 2015. He was loaned to Juventus that summer, then again in August 2016, leaving Stamford Bridge to make a permanent move to Torino in May 2017.
Crystal Palace: Valerien Ishmael It took until 2013, when Dwight Gayle arrived at Crystal Palace, to banish the lingering ghost of Valerie Ishmael once and for all. The defender was the club’s record signing in 15 years after joining from Strasbourg for £2.75m in Steve Coppell’s ill-fated attempt to retain their Premier League status. The Frenchman made 13 appearances, left after nine months for less than £2.75m and spent seven years at Bayern Munich. He currently manages Watford after managing Besiktas, West Brom and Barnsley.
Everton: Cenk Tosun He was described by then manager Sam Allardyce (still seems strange) as “the best in Europe” for £27m in 2018. We don’t think that’s true, and 11 goals in 61 games for Everton can provide pretty convincing evidence . . It took the Toffees four years to sign the sacked Tosu, who finally left last summer when he returned to Besiktas for a second job.
Fulham: Kostas Mitroglou Let Steve Sidwell tell the story: “In January we needed a striker in the relegation battle. So they went and got Kostas Mitroglou, I think his name was. Damn, he didn’t stop eating. In fact, he did, I’m telling you now, he didn’t stop eating. He was a big boy. And you know protein bars, every time you’d see him he’d be walking around the practice field with a damn protein bar.” What Sidwell didn’t say: The Greek striker was signed for £12m in January 2014 and went three games without a goal before Fulham were relegated. He later left the club in 2016 after Fulham recovered around half of their investment from Benfica. Who then turned the striker to Marseille. He was last seen in the German amateur leagues. Liverpool: Andy Carroll The odd, desperation purchase of Preston’s Ben Davies brings Carroll close, but there can only be one. No laptop guru worth his salt could have approved a £35 million move for a 22-year-old striker with 14 Premier League goals, but Liverpool panicked over such a move in January 2011. With Fernando Torres on his way to Chelsea, a replacement had to be found. Newcastle were so surprised by the selection of Carroll that they rejected an initial offer of 30m £. Liverpool somehow got £5m to get their man. Carroll became the most expensive footballer of all time and the most expensive British player. He didn’t make his debut until March, didn’t score his first goal until April, scored just 11 times in 58 games and was sold for just £15m in 2013. At least Steven Caulker was on loan.
Luton: N/A Try as we might, we couldn’t find a January transfer turkey for Luton. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Enlighten us hat makers… Manchester City: Wilfried Bony Before Harry Kane officially became the A thing, Wilfried Bony wrote “League top scorer in one calendar year with 20 goals in 2014″ under the achievements section of his CV. And it worked damn well, with Manchester City so impressed by the Swansea forward’s productivity that they parted with £25m to sign him and replace Edin Dzeko. Ten goals in 46 games did not convince the newly appointed Pep Guardiola that he could lead the line.
Manchester United: Alexis Sanchez Remember when Manchester United fans were confused about this? Remember when trading lazy pea-heart Henrikh Mkhitaryan for street fighter Alexis Sanchez was considered a phenomenal deal? Remember the piano and joy? Less than three years later, they let him leave on a free transfer (and had to pay a wedge themselves) when they realized that simply offering the Chilean a higher salary than Manchester City would not amount to a reward.
Newcastle: Jean-Alain Boumsong The transfer was so inexplicable that it was an important part of Stevens’ investigation into football corruption. Newcastle even outdid themselves in January 2005. Jean-Alain Boumsong was a free agent for just six months before Graeme Souness signed him from Rangers for £8 million. with a five-year contract. – The supporters enjoy him playing, said the Scot. – He might be the main man in our football team. I think he hopes to be up there with the likes of Terry and Ferdinand. Wogan and Anton probably.
Nottingham Forest: Rafik Djebbour Djebbour djisaster… the then 30-year-old Ekira man joined Forest from Olympiakos in January 2014 on a two-and-a-half-year deal and scored on his debut against Yeovil. But it was as good as it got. He did not score in another seven games after being dropped by interim manager Gary Brazil due to poor training and attitude. At the end of the season, both parties realized they messed up and agreed to go their separate ways.
Sheffield United: Geoff Horsfield Strictly speaking, Horsfield’s signing was in February, but he was so terrible that the story bears repeating. Neil Warnock took him on loan from West Brom in 2006 and it went so disastrously that both sides wanted to end the loan. “Warnock wants to get rid of me,” said Horsfield. “He told me he couldn’t see me going to the team now or next season. Then he told me he didn’t want me to go to his company and train at home. But the Baggies saw an opportunity to get rid of the farm striker and claimed the Blades have an obligation to buy at the end of the season for £1.2m. He never played for the Blades and scored a massive four goals in three loan spells with Leeds, Leicester and Scunthorpe before finally being released in 2009. Ouch. Southampton: Guido Carrillo As a firefighter arriving with a water gun, Guido Carrillo was absolutely the last thing the Southampton doctor ordered. The striker started more Premier League games (five) than shots (four), contributing about as much as Mark Hughes to the club’s successful relegation battle. He later left on a free transfer (to Elchesse) in October 2022 without scoring a single goal for Southampton. Reminder: he cost £20m.
Tottenham: Ricardo Rocha The story of Tottenham’s 2006/07 season should be part of the national curriculum. From fifth in the Premier League to two quarter-finals and one semi-final, there was also a goal from Paul Robinson, recently awarded fifth player of the month, and Edgar Davids, who played alongside Andy Barcham and Dorian Dervite. League Cup quarter-final draw. Just to cement his legacy, Ricardo Rocha joined for £3.2m and two friendlies between Tottenham and Benfica, with the Portuguese club keeping all the receipts. He started only 16 games over three seasons. West Ham: Savio Nsereko The worst Premier League transfer of January. Savio made more interceptions than goals in England despite his club-record four-and-a-half-year reign at West Ham. The Vassars thought they stole the rest of Europe’s march when they brought it
